Sunday, December 31, 2006

In search of Donna Rosanne...

From time to time you have asked..."Where is Donna Rosanne from the morning show a few years ago?"

and until now my answer has been..."Donna, husband and girls have moved to Augusta."

but rumors floating around say Donna, John and the family have moved back home to North Carolina.

You know papa john's place does not put any faith in rumor so my assistant (Judy-code name Baby Baby) and I set on a search for the truth...

Where in the world is Donna Rosanne?

First clue:

We received this Christmas card from "Rosie" and the family..nice pictures of the girls...they are all grownup and have repented from hiding my shoes when they were little girls hanging around the station. A zipcode on the postmark gives us a beginning for our search.

My assistant Judy did a search on and determined we should head to the capital of Chatham county...

Baby Baby hooked up her GPS and directed me to Highway 64...

After an hour or so we saw exit 386...I started getting really happy..."THis is going to be a piece a cake!"

Heading into town I spied some limos and decide to stop and see if they ever heard of the Roseannes since they are known to be formal party people...

BUMMER! Turned out to be the funeral parlor... my countenance fell!

As we hit the city limits my excitement returned... the speed limit sign was leaning... I shouted out ..."PAYDIRT!

Bet Donna did that trying to dodge one of the many wild deer in the area. Yeah!"...

A few more minutes and we were in the heart of the capital city...beautiful courthouse filled with lots of helfpful info about the Roseannes but unfortunately for us..."CLOSED FOR THE HOLIDAYS".

This is going to be a little harder than I expected!

One block up we had a breakthrough... I spotted the Nationwide agent.

Surely they would know Donna... with her driving record and all. "CLOSED for holiday"...MAN!

Now getting desperate...Judy suggested I go next door and check out the Ladies Fitness Center.

They had heard of Donna... some of the girls even remembered Donna as a bit of a trouble maker in Sunday School as a teen when she tried to convince the pastor to add "KUM BA YAH" and other contemporary tunes to the hymnbook...

but none knew where she was now.

They suggested I try the "Y".

Sure enough... the "Y" had some Roseannes on file and gave me a few numbers I could try...

I was getting frazzled! I tried several numbers but nothing... until the last one.

got a wrong number and ended up talking to someone at Glosson's Chicken Ranch. They knew of Donna and said they heard she lived on one of the major highways near the city. I thanked them and headed back downtown.

Only one problem... we quickly learned there are major highway going in every direction! And those little round blue "Evacuation Route" signs everywhere bothered me. Is there something they're not telling us?

It was getting late and I was giving up fast. Donna where are you?!!!

Judy came up with a great idea as usual...

"Let's go down the road to Siler City... maybe we can find Aunt Bea's homeplace. We can look for Donna later when we have more time."

Turned out to be a great idea... first thing, I spoted a thrift store and a "MIGHTY DOLLAR" dollar store...

"S-H-O-P-P-I-N-G now..
S-L-E-U-T-H-I-N-G later!"

See you next year!

Saturday, December 30, 2006

Santa says...if not the get the...


Dear John:
just remember...
if you're not going for the gold...
you're going for the coal.

and as I told Forrest Gump many Christmases ago..."That's all I got to say about that!"

Your friend...Santa.

Santa...just one more...before jan 1



dear santa...hope your N and N list starts on january 1 cause i just found one more picture of tami with her now famous "teeth out" look. couldn't resist.

your friend...john

see you at the pole!

ps...santa..i've just learned to crop pics...what u think? j

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Email response ... Santa, Whatsup with the...


dear santa...i was at mema's house Christmas eve and Christmas day and i didn't get a thing...except that bowl ...what's up with that? you having problem finding the farm or what?



I applaud you for spending Christmas with Mema... you did a good job washing her new ride with the dual crome pipes.

AND NO problem finding the farm, everybody knows where MEMA lives but just to be sure I had RUDOLF...

to do a "flyover" early Christmas eve just to make sure our GPS system was functioning properly. Everything was right on the money...even saw "BIG RED" on the back porch.

But John... there was one problem. Remember that "N and N" LIST I keep? I just assumed since you work with WBFJ that there would be no problem.

But John...
remember that meeting where Wally's serious prayer became the "Itsy-Bitsy Spider" thingy?

And John, remember Tami's birthday party where you were supposed to be honoring her and cheering her up? And you caught her in that embarassing picture, making her look like she had no teeth! And you blogged it for the whole world to see.

So John, in good conscience, about all I could leave you this year...

was a little bowl of potatoes...

BUT John...just remember...even when Santa hands you potatoes...make chips.

And John, concerning that old '93 Jag you keep asking for... maybe next year. I'll be checking your blog as I make my list.

your friend...



dear santa...i think icatch your drift...(get it?)ho...ho...ho

see you at the pole!


PS...Santa...them potatoes got eyes...just like you.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

"Tickle-Me-Elvis" SOLD OUT...Sorry, no rainchecks ...

Just a few more days and MEMA's Christmas Shoppe will be closing for the season...this year's hottest item, "Tickle-Me-Elvis" sold out in 24 hours! No wonder... Elvis was wiggling way before ELMO was born!

This is one unique gift...tickle the buckle and Elvis sings "Blue Christmas"

It's not a well known fact but... like Mema, Elvis loved bears!

Sorry, you missed out on this "Once-in-a lifetime" rarity but Mema's Gallery is filled with other interesting folk for your consideration...

Hey, thanks for looking... you're always welcome at MEMA's and

Come back anytime! And as we celebrate the birthday of the KING of Kings I ask the FATHER to bless you in a special way as you honor HIS Son...and if you haven't met HIM yet, why not ask Jesus into your heart right now? What are you waiting for?

MERRY CHRISTMAS from MEMA...Me (and Judy)... and of course, from the big "E"!

Friday, December 22, 2006

Duncan Dough...uh...Marshmallows?

WBFJ Christmas Concert at Hanes Mall with Bryan Duncan...OUTSTANDING!

But apparently Bryan missed the memo..throw out doughnuts not marshmallows..oh well, everybody seemed happy to get the snowman "stuff".

Big crowd with celebrities! Check right side of the aisle...5 rows the green shirt...

Looks like Donnie Osmond* to me...he probably came for the "little bit of rock-n-roll" to go along with Maries "little bit country"..reckon?

And Tami's cousin VINNYetta* was spotted near the back...this blog loves people with colored hair...

Bryan's parents were our special guests...they love their son's music like me do!
When questioned about Bryan's spunky demeanor..."We did the best we could!"

Tami slipped Bryan the old motorcycle handshake to get his attention...Bryan was whispering under his breath, "Oh, no, This woman's going to kiss me...NOT!

You're safe Bryan, Tami is happily married and just wanted to share some motorcycle stories with you.

One slightly unusual thing I've never seen before...the autograph session was so hot and heavy they had to keep the sharpies on ice...seemed to work fine.

On the way out Bryan's brother Don on his right compare Looneytunes ties with WBFJ's Darren Stevens.

Great Concert... let's do it again next year!


**Blogger Cast and Credits: Red haired lady courtesy of Macy's window display.

Donnie "O" look-a-like is my friend Ronnie and he does get accused of looking like Donnie a lot.(after this I hope he is still my

Everybody else were themselves... lol.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

WBFJ Christmas Office appears!

Kurt opens the party with his rendition of "ELF"... rapidly replacing Wally's "Itsy bitsy Spider" thing in popularity.

And is a bit more colorful. Sorry Wally.

Verne gazes into his Giant Appalachian Tree ornament (from Bonnie) and predicts Applachian will have a great 2007 season. YEAH, RIGHT, Verne...YOU'RE JUST CHECKING YOUR HAIR!!! You're BUSTED!!!!

Darren gets a bowl of hot stuff...

Darren sweats a little.

Jenn gets gloves?

("Why did Wally give me these rubber gloves and 10 bottles of PURELL? Is he trying to tell me something?" He's getting a gallon of Pinesol at the New Years Party! or worse!)

Wally admiring his "Friends Are Friends Forever Book" by Michael W. Smith given by Tami with an "i". Apparently this book has been showing up a lot on a regular basis.

Tami managed to write stuff all in it to end the "Fruitcake Syndrome". Wally you'd have to tear out half the book to re-gift it (Come to think of it...maybe that explains why half the pages from the "Purpose Driven Devotions" book Wally gave me last year were If you click on the picture you can read a little of it.

Poor Eric...he tried to act surprised by his gift from Deke. Apparently Deke ruffled up the Wednesday sales papers and stuffed them in a bag to look like a real gift. Eric was so gracious..."Thanks Deke... Now I'll get to see all the sales I missed last week...I am so happy...I thought I had missed those deals...yipee" (if you ever saw the movie "The Jerk" (preferably the tv version) this will make more

When Deke got his gift of his favorite coffee, out of guilt, he hid his face ...raised his hand and admitted he had given Eric a bag of papers. Shame off you Deke!

Being a Lover of Country Style Steak and Mashed Potatoes I was overjoyed when Kurt gave me a gift certificate for BELL BROTHERS CAFE. I looked over at Wally and saw the envy in his face.

Tami was so blessed...TY Pennington from ABC's "EXTREME MOME MAKEOVER" sent her an "Extreme Home Makeover Production Kit" complete with a roll of official "HOT SET" yellow caution tape from the program...

And an "OFFICIAL TY APPROVED" "little Wonder" hand drill...made officially in TY-Wan.

And an "Official" autographed Ty MEGAPHONE...complete with batteries and a siren!

B-U-S !!!!!!!!"

"Boys this party is over....


Oh MY, we've created a monster! lol.